How many years have you?

“Some of the most beautiful chapters in your story will only begin when you stop re reading the old ones” 

Christin Hume Unsplash

This quote attributed to Karen Salmansohn - author and behavioural change expert - resonated so much with me as we rolled into this year. This and the question that was posed to us by the 3 children we met while volunteering in Central America at the end of last year.

The children aged 3, 7 and 11 live in the mountains of El Salvador on an organic farm built by their inspirational parents who are in their late 30’s/ early 40’s.

One of the first questions they asked us when we met, in their near perfect English was “how many years have you?”

This was such a valid question, and their direct translation made us think about our age in a totally new way.

Helen & Miles in El Pital, El Salvador. Nov 2025 (Age = 58 and 54)

At the start of our month with them we were so unsure of how we would cope working at altitude in a very different environment from ‘home’. We knew that the weather could be a challenge however we did not know that there would also be frequent power cuts, no source of warmth once the sun went down and not much in the way of hot water.

The day we arrived at the farm it was really stormy and the power lines were down, we soon found out that this happened quite frequently. Not long after we arrived so too did the pitch-black night, which descends at approximately 5:20pm in November, and so we had to navigate our way to our new ‘home’ a very basic cabin and outdoor ‘bathroom’ by the light of a small candle in a jam jar.

As I reflect now upon our experiences over the weeks that we spent in El Salvador and Nicaragua I know that there has been a huge shift in the energy that I now carry with me. I also think very differently about the number of years that I have been alive. I feel more capable and much braver and this is because I feel so much more positive and sure of my abilities and my resilience.

I am no longer afraid and that in itself is so incredibly powerful and empowering.

In my role as a health and wellness coach I know that is often about asking the right questions in order to help to unlock or move a story on. It is during this next chapter where the expansion and growth happens.

I know what I have been telling myself and what limitations this has created for me.

What story or narratives do you tell yourself?

Which ones are holding you back?

Have these thoughts become habits or beliefs and are these limiting you in any way?

As I write it is nearly the start of the Chinese New Year and this one promises to bring with it the energy of the ‘fire horse’.

As a metal pig myself born in 1971 it is somewhat ‘vital’ according to all of the predictions, that I prioritize my wellness this year. As this fire horse energy may at times prove to be one that the ‘peaceful and calm pig sometimes feels is ‘too much to bear’ and there is a real risk of ‘burnout’.

I am totally accepting of this as a key focus for me this year and so will embrace this message wholeheartedly.

‘Fire Horse’ in the sunshine from Unsplash

When my husband Miles and I went to Central America last November to volunteer we were faced with the unknown in every single way possible. However the way in which both stepped into this space, embraced it and then worked together is one of our proudest achievements so far.

We look at each other in new ways now and the experience was life changing for us both on many different levels.

For me the particular relevance of Karen Salmonsohn’s quote is that since 2011, when I had thyroid surgery for an autoimmune condition that was quite simply taking over my life, I have told myself a very particular ‘story’.

This narrative has been running in the background of my life continuously and it was only when I gave myself the time and space to really reflect - away from all of the noise and distractions - I came to realise that I had grown afraid of quite a few things and having been so anxious about my health, I had built myself a wall of ‘protection’.

And whilst I have made many healthy changes to my lifestyle since 2011, it is the emotions that I have drawn tightly in around me, like a big blanket and so I have spent much of my time tucking in those edges and keeping it all neat and therefore me ‘safe’.

For me to do very physical work at altitude for 8 hours a day for nearly a month was going to be a challenge. So was the idea of eating food that might not be familiar to me or more importantly under my ‘control’. Would I be able to push myself beyond anything I had ever done before and in cold and damp conditions?

What happened when I ‘let go’ and embraced all of this experience? I learnt some very valuable and life altering things.

I learnt that the weight training I have been doing over the last few years has really paid off. I am stronger than I thought and at a deeper level than I imagined.

I learnt that I can eat pretty much anything without ill effect and still feel really clean and healthy. I lost unwanted excess kilos by doing this physical work and as a result I felt strong and toned. Drinking no alcohol at all left me with total clarity and focus. Most of all though I realised that I was very resilient and adaptable and could do so much more than I had imagined or had been telling myself.

What this means and why I feel compelled to share this, is the fact that I could now begin a totally new chapter. My ‘old story’ has lost its hold over me; it’s power and relevance are gone.

I have through this experience removed many obstacles and barriers that held me, which I thought kept me ‘safe’ – I am now free of this narrative and these restrictions.

Above the clouds in El Pital, El Salvador Nov 2025

Sitting down to supper on our last night the family told us that although we were ‘by far the oldest’ volunteers that they had hosted in their 13 years, we were also amongst the hardest working.

We now smile very broadly whenever we retell this particular part of our story.

What else?

Well, I know now that it is so important to also tell ourselves that the ‘number of years that we have’ are not in any way limiting.

Instead, each year is a precious and wonderful gift and we should be so proud of everything that we have achieved so far.

“When we deny our stories, they define us. When we own our stories, we get to write a brave new ending.” Brené Brown

I would love to help to support you now. If it is 1:1 coaching that you feel may help you, or you would like an aromatherapy massage and ‘time out’, away from all of the noise and distractions, then I can help with that too.